What Do Children And Youth With Disabilities Need To Know About Disability?
There are thousands of ways to answer this question. Most of them are based on a few core ideas about disability. These are ideas that don’t always come naturally to young people with disabilities or their parents, which is why I think it’s a good idea to spell them out.
- Physical access and accommodations to your disability aren’t personal favors or privileges. They are rights you have as a citizen. No matter what your disability is, or how “severe” it is, you have the right to go everywhere non-disabled people go, and do everything non-disabled people do when they get there.
- You may need help from other people all of your life, but that doesn’t mean you have to make people like you all the time. It’s good to be kind, polite, and cheerful, but you can also be angry sometimes, sad sometimes, grumpy sometimes. It’s also okay to decide that you don’t like someone. You won’t be abandoned just because you made a caregiver angry. You are not a burden. You are a person, and you don’t have to “earn” your care by being a perfect angel and never complaining.
- It’s good to make careful decisions about the things you want to do, and how you use the energy and resources you have. But don’t give up on exciting opportunities because you think might need help and you don’t want to be a bother.
- You don’t have to be able to do everything by yourself, exactly the way other people do things, to be independent and successful. It’s okay to do things differently, and it’s okay to get help. Independence is about making your own decisions and organizing your own life, not being able to walk or tie your shoes.
- There are literally millions of people with disabilities all over the world who have an idea of what it’s like having your disability. Don’t turn away from others with disabilities because disability makes you sad, or because you think it will keep you from fitting in and being more “normal”. Other disabled people can be a great source of advice, friendship, and support you can’t really get from anyone else.